“Keep Scrolling”

Anyone close to me knows that I go straight into protector mode when it comes to my family.

Is sister bear syndrome a thing? Daughter bear syndrome? If so I have it, maybe I’ll make it a thing…with shirts and hats and the whole nine yards. You know, just like the mama bear/papa bear swag? This girl right here was a sister bear in full force and absolute RAGE this afternoon when my sister texted me, only hours after a negative pregnancy test… and news that their 10th IUI, 7th in the last year, was unsuccessful; sharing that someone had THE NERVE to tell them to “be careful” about sharing news like this on social media, and it could come across as “insensitive” because some women can’t have children at all.

While this is true… and the message was sent to “just be mindful”… let me scream it for the people in the back…

🗣 SECONDARY INFERTILITY IS REAL

🗣FEELINGS DURING SECONDARY INFERTILITY ARE JUSTIFIED

🗣SECONDARY INFERTILITY ISN’T EASIER BECAUSE YOU ALREADY HAVE A CHILD

Social media is an outlet for many, and this is not what those facing infertility need, and DEFINITELY not what my sister and her husband needed the DAY their hearts were shattered into a million pieces!!

The beauty of social media is that people can state their beliefs, opinions and feelings about various things; and feel justified or feel some sort of relief in getting something hard off their chest. It has unfortunately turned into a place of “tiptoeing” around and not wanting to offend others. While I can understand this around some topics, infertility is DEFINITELY not something we should have to “tiptoe” around or worry about offending others.

Infertility is a health problem. Secondary infertility is👏🏻 a👏🏻 health👏🏻problem👏🏻 It is not a choice. It doesn’t discriminate. Feelings during infertility are raw and hopeless. The majority of couples struggling with infertility stay silent and you would have NO idea they face this battle every day. It is more prevalent than you can even begin to imagine.

🚨If you aren’t a fan of something you read related to infertility on social media, or are scared it may offend someone struggling, then my advice to you is to keep scrolling. Us infertility warriors have pretty thick skin and we’ll be just fine 👌🏻

🛑Don’t tell someone that there are children in foster care to be adopted.

🛑Don’t tell someone to “focus on the one they have”.

🛑Don’t tell someone that it’s not as hard for them because they already have a child.

🛑🛑DONT private message someone the DAY they share heartbreaking news, and tell them to be careful because it may offend someone.

Chances are; just like my sisters and I, and my fellow warriors have done for years; those struggling will ❤️ a post, even comment and say “Congratulations” or “she’s beautiful”, and keep scrolling. (Or in my sisters case, an “I’m so sorry” would suffice.)

We SURE AS HELL would NEVER message someone and warn them to “be careful”, as not to offend others when they share such vulnerable information about their infertility struggles‼️

Guess who IS offended when you do that? MY SISTER & HER HUSBAND who’ve had the shittiest day finding out the most heart breaking news. NOW who’s the insensitive one?!

Infertility warriors “keep scrolling” EVERY DAY, and we put on a damn smile while doing it. We can do this because we are good people. We are happy for others who have been blessed🙏🏻 and don’t feel the need to insert ourselves into others business or personal lives. All while hoping, with each pregnancy announcement we see, that our prayers, too, will be answered soon.

If we can do it, so can you. If you don’t like it, unfollow or block the account. We sure as hell don’t need your two cents ✌️